Game of Lulz (GOT Parody Season 1)
Jun 16, 2015 5:46:14 GMT -6
Kragen, Sincara, and 1 more like this
Post by Gaia on Jun 16, 2015 5:46:14 GMT -6
Eddard: Winter is coming!
Catelyn: Oh? When will it get here?
Eddard: Uhh...
Catelyn: You don't know, do you?
Eddard: Winter is coming!
Robert: A war is coming, Ned. I don't know who we'll be fighting, all I know is it's coming.
Eddard: Will it happen in winter?
Robert: What is your bloody obsession with that season?
Eddard: You get to build snowmen, live in igloos, have snowball fights. Winter is going to be awesome!
Catelyn: Bran, I have one favor to ask of you.
Bran: Yes, Mother?
Catelyn: No. More. Climbing. Promise me, Bran.
Bran: Yes, Mother.
Ten seconds later
Bran: lol like I'd ever stop climbing! Whoa, boobs!
Cersei: Brother! That perverted little boy is staring at my tits!
Jaime: I can't knock your taste in women, son, but I can knock you! Knocks Bran out the window
Bran: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Catelyn: The one thing I ask him to do. The ONE thing and he can't even do that.
Jon: I've come to pay my respects to Bran.
Catelyn: It should've been you, you know.
Jon: I understand that – whoa, wow. Okay. That's kind of unnecessary.
Catelyn: I'm glad you're going away to the wall so you can't challenge my eldest for heir of Winterfell, even though you're a bastard and can't inherit anything anyway.
Jon: You're projecting, so I'm going to say goodbye to Bran and get as far away from you as humanly possible.
Sansa: I'm going to be queen, and Prince Joffrey is going to be my husband, and I will have his beautiful blonde babies, and everyone will bow to us, and I'll have all my dreams come true, and absolutely nothing will go wrong ever!
Arya: Your new boyfriend looks like a girl.
Sansa: And you look like a boy, what's your point?
Arya: Ooh, catty.
Tyrion: They say the boy may yet live. I'm extremely curious to hear what he has to say.
Jaime: There are times I wonder whose side you're on.
Tyrion: I'm Tyrion Lannister, Master of Whores, I'm on the side with the most pussy.
Cersei: Welp, I had just about enough of your shit! Come on, children, let's go somewhere G rated.
Tyrion: You'll have an easier time finding a place in Westeros that's PG-13.
Killer: I'm going to kill Bran now.
Catelyn: The hell you are!
Direwolf: FOOOOOOOOOOOD! Snacks on killer
Killer: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Catelyn: What is this knife?
Littlefinger: That's totally Tyrion's knife.
Catelyn: Are you sure?
Littlefinger: Yup. Totally Tyrion's. There's no one else whose knife that could be.
Catelyn: That little bitch!
Catelyn: You're under arrest for the attempted murder of my son Bran.
Tyrion: That's funny, I don't remember trying to kill Bran. I think I would remember such a scheme, and be as far away from the north as physically possible.
Catelyn: Don't try to logic your way out of this, you're coming with me.
Tyrion: I guess I don't have anything better to do.
Lysa: I also charge you with the death of my husband!
Tyrion: Let me guess, I killed him in my sleep?
Lysa: Silence, dwarf!
Tyrion: Excuse me, we prefer 'Westerian Compact.'
Lysa: Who will fight for the Lannister filth?
Bronn: I'll fight for the Lannister filth.
Tyrion: I get the feeling we're going to be good bros.
Some Guy: I'll fight for the lady.
Bronn: Look, two-thousand gold dragons!
Some Guy: OMG WHERE!? falls down the Moon Door
Viserys: I was to be the king of this world!
Drogo: King, huh? Here's your crown. Burns Viserys
Viserys: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Daenerys: lol!
Littlefinger: I'm Lord Baelish, Master of Coin, and owner of the brothel. You shouldn't trust me because I will sell you out in a heartbeat.
Eddard: You seem like a good enough guy. I trust you.
Littlefinger: You didn't hear a single word I said, did you?
Eddard: But that Varys? I definitely don't trust him. Creepy men with no penises. Disgusting.
Littlefinger: This is going to be the easiest payday ever.
Eddard: I learned the truth that Jon Arryn died for.
Cersei: Why are you telling me this and not Robert?
Eddard: I thought I would give you the chance to take your children and flee.
Cersei: You northerns are amusing. No, I'm going to take this time to plot Robert's death so my family can seize power.
Eddard: I knew I never should have left Winterfell.
Melisandre: I know I'm not supposed to appear yet, but I need to tell you about your future.
Eddard: Let me guess, I die.
Melisandre: Worse. You star in a Wachowski's Production with Mila Kunis.
Eddard: I need to fire my agent.
High Septon: What is to be done with the traitor?
Joffrey: Well, Mother wants him to take the black, and my wife to be wants mercy, but both have failed to account for the fact that I'm fucking insane! OFF WITH HIS HEAD!
Sansa: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Cersei: Oh, my gods, I never could have predicted this.
Ilyn: Any last words?
Eddard: I hope your king chokes on his wedding cake!
Joffrey: Fat chance of that happening.
Ilyn: Cuts off Ned's head
Arya: Oh, it is on like Donkey Kong!
Tywin: I am surrounded by idiots!
Tyrion: I've been telling you that for years.
Tywin: Silence, dwarf!
Tyrion: Westerian Compact.
Melisandre: Agent doing you wrong? Annoying family member? A meddling neighbor won't give you your privacy? Being bullied at school? Sacrifice them to the Lord of Light to enrich your life. Call 1-800-Lord-of-Light today.
Catelyn: Oh? When will it get here?
Eddard: Uhh...
Catelyn: You don't know, do you?
Eddard: Winter is coming!
Robert: A war is coming, Ned. I don't know who we'll be fighting, all I know is it's coming.
Eddard: Will it happen in winter?
Robert: What is your bloody obsession with that season?
Eddard: You get to build snowmen, live in igloos, have snowball fights. Winter is going to be awesome!
Catelyn: Bran, I have one favor to ask of you.
Bran: Yes, Mother?
Catelyn: No. More. Climbing. Promise me, Bran.
Bran: Yes, Mother.
Ten seconds later
Bran: lol like I'd ever stop climbing! Whoa, boobs!
Cersei: Brother! That perverted little boy is staring at my tits!
Jaime: I can't knock your taste in women, son, but I can knock you! Knocks Bran out the window
Bran: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Catelyn: The one thing I ask him to do. The ONE thing and he can't even do that.
Jon: I've come to pay my respects to Bran.
Catelyn: It should've been you, you know.
Jon: I understand that – whoa, wow. Okay. That's kind of unnecessary.
Catelyn: I'm glad you're going away to the wall so you can't challenge my eldest for heir of Winterfell, even though you're a bastard and can't inherit anything anyway.
Jon: You're projecting, so I'm going to say goodbye to Bran and get as far away from you as humanly possible.
Sansa: I'm going to be queen, and Prince Joffrey is going to be my husband, and I will have his beautiful blonde babies, and everyone will bow to us, and I'll have all my dreams come true, and absolutely nothing will go wrong ever!
Arya: Your new boyfriend looks like a girl.
Sansa: And you look like a boy, what's your point?
Arya: Ooh, catty.
Tyrion: They say the boy may yet live. I'm extremely curious to hear what he has to say.
Jaime: There are times I wonder whose side you're on.
Tyrion: I'm Tyrion Lannister, Master of Whores, I'm on the side with the most pussy.
Cersei: Welp, I had just about enough of your shit! Come on, children, let's go somewhere G rated.
Tyrion: You'll have an easier time finding a place in Westeros that's PG-13.
Killer: I'm going to kill Bran now.
Catelyn: The hell you are!
Direwolf: FOOOOOOOOOOOD! Snacks on killer
Killer: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Catelyn: What is this knife?
Littlefinger: That's totally Tyrion's knife.
Catelyn: Are you sure?
Littlefinger: Yup. Totally Tyrion's. There's no one else whose knife that could be.
Catelyn: That little bitch!
Catelyn: You're under arrest for the attempted murder of my son Bran.
Tyrion: That's funny, I don't remember trying to kill Bran. I think I would remember such a scheme, and be as far away from the north as physically possible.
Catelyn: Don't try to logic your way out of this, you're coming with me.
Tyrion: I guess I don't have anything better to do.
Lysa: I also charge you with the death of my husband!
Tyrion: Let me guess, I killed him in my sleep?
Lysa: Silence, dwarf!
Tyrion: Excuse me, we prefer 'Westerian Compact.'
Lysa: Who will fight for the Lannister filth?
Bronn: I'll fight for the Lannister filth.
Tyrion: I get the feeling we're going to be good bros.
Some Guy: I'll fight for the lady.
Bronn: Look, two-thousand gold dragons!
Some Guy: OMG WHERE!? falls down the Moon Door
Viserys: I was to be the king of this world!
Drogo: King, huh? Here's your crown. Burns Viserys
Viserys: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Daenerys: lol!
Littlefinger: I'm Lord Baelish, Master of Coin, and owner of the brothel. You shouldn't trust me because I will sell you out in a heartbeat.
Eddard: You seem like a good enough guy. I trust you.
Littlefinger: You didn't hear a single word I said, did you?
Eddard: But that Varys? I definitely don't trust him. Creepy men with no penises. Disgusting.
Littlefinger: This is going to be the easiest payday ever.
Eddard: I learned the truth that Jon Arryn died for.
Cersei: Why are you telling me this and not Robert?
Eddard: I thought I would give you the chance to take your children and flee.
Cersei: You northerns are amusing. No, I'm going to take this time to plot Robert's death so my family can seize power.
Eddard: I knew I never should have left Winterfell.
Melisandre: I know I'm not supposed to appear yet, but I need to tell you about your future.
Eddard: Let me guess, I die.
Melisandre: Worse. You star in a Wachowski's Production with Mila Kunis.
Eddard: I need to fire my agent.
High Septon: What is to be done with the traitor?
Joffrey: Well, Mother wants him to take the black, and my wife to be wants mercy, but both have failed to account for the fact that I'm fucking insane! OFF WITH HIS HEAD!
Sansa: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Cersei: Oh, my gods, I never could have predicted this.
Ilyn: Any last words?
Eddard: I hope your king chokes on his wedding cake!
Joffrey: Fat chance of that happening.
Ilyn: Cuts off Ned's head
Arya: Oh, it is on like Donkey Kong!
Tywin: I am surrounded by idiots!
Tyrion: I've been telling you that for years.
Tywin: Silence, dwarf!
Tyrion: Westerian Compact.
Melisandre: Agent doing you wrong? Annoying family member? A meddling neighbor won't give you your privacy? Being bullied at school? Sacrifice them to the Lord of Light to enrich your life. Call 1-800-Lord-of-Light today.
FIN
